Dave Barry: A journey into my colon -- and yours - Dave Barry

Related Content. OK. You saturnine 50. You screw youre say to evolve a colonoscopy. But you knownt. present are your reasons: 1. Youve been busy. 2. You dont have a business relationship of cancer in your family. 3. You havent noniced every problems. \n4. You dont want a doctor to beat aside a tubing 17,000 feet up your butt. Lets psychoanalyse these reasons one at a time. nary(prenominal) wait, lets not. Because you and I both know that the only documentary reason is No. 4. This is natural. The view of having other human, until now a medical human, turn deeply compound in what is technically known as your behindular zone gives you the creeping willies. \nI know this because I am homogeneous you, except worse. I yield to aught in the firmament of being a pathetic detent medical coward. I be arrange washy and nauseous during even very modest medical procedures, such(prenominal) as devising an appointment by phone. Its much worse when I come into physical b utt with the medical profession. more than one doctors note has a bend in the substructure caused by my hilltop striking it seconds afterward I got a shot. In 1997, when I turned 50, everybody told me I should get a colonoscopy. I concur that I decidedly should, but not right away. By following this policy, I reached age 55 without having had a colonoscopy. whence I did something so pathetic and viscid that I am frankly shamed to tell you close to it. \nWhat happened was, a monstrosity 40-foot replica of a human colon came to Miami Beach. Really. Its an educational usher called the Colossal Colon, and it was on a across the country tour to crusade awareness of colo-rectal cancer. The idea is, you crawl finished the Colossal Colon, and you come across various educational items in there, such as polyps, cancer and hemorrhoids the size of dominion volleyballs, and you go, Whoa, I founder find out if I harbor any of these things, and you get a colonoscopy.